I used to be a tough kid who would rarely cry except for when I felt like there was an injustice. For instance, when my parents would accuse me of something I didn’t do and didn’t apologize after, or when my brother stole my Legos (that I bought) and said that they were his. Even as a child I understood fairness and that I wanted it. It’s human nature to want fairness. We write contracts and hire lawyers, all in the name of getting what we "deserve".
That’s why it’s hard for this world to understand grace. Fairness, according to the world, dictates that if we don’t hold up our end of the deal then, contractually, God won’t hold up His. This leads people to believe that they cannot be forgiven, even though a contract system could not work with God in the first place.
God doesn’t make contracts. A contract is an agreement with specific terms in which there is a promise to do something in return for a benefit. Contractual actions with an “If…,Then…,” mentality only work among equals and God is perfect and holy. No one can compare to Him. Nor does His love cease for us when we sin.
I have made promises to God that I have broken time and time again and it frustrates me. There are points when I don’t want God to forgive me so easily. I tell Him to get angry, punish me, and make me atone; maybe then I would learn my lesson and keep a promise for once. Instead, He responds gently and reminds me that He cannot deny Himself.
For God said to Moses, “I will show mercy to anyone I choose, and I will show compassion to anyone I choose.” So it is God who decides to show mercy. We can neither choose it nor work for it. (Romans 9:15-16)
There is nothing we can do that will make God love us more or less, and for this reason, God made us a special covenant. This covenant is an irrevocable, unconditional promise made to benefit the covenantee. The promise God makes stands even when we fail on our part.
That isn’t to say we can live however we want. We should still try our best to be sinless; it’s beneficial, as it brings us closer to God. However, “our best,” is never good enough and God knows that. That is why He has a “grace clause”. No matter how far we fall or for how long we wander, it’s never too much or too far for Him to bring us back.
God never ceases to amaze me. I often imagine the vastness of the universe and how it is still growing at an immeasurable pace, about all the intricacies and the beauty of each and every plant and star until I feel like a minuscule speck in the midst of it all. Then, I think of the one who created it all; what He did for me, and all because He wants to spend time with me. How He takes care of my needs and speaks to me even though I’m sinful and undeserving any of Him. Because of God's mercy and love, we don't receive what's "fair". I still cry over unfairness, but for an entirely different reason now.