The Lord sometimes can warn us or start to prepare us for a difficult season to come. Over the summer we had a lot going on. A lot of new changes happening in the coming months. We were going to have a baby in August, my husband was starting a new position in August, and our kids were starting school—in August. We had started to prepare and we were going to be ready!
Well the Lord had a different plan. The baby came in July. We were thrown off. We weren't expecting it, the pregnancy had been going so well this time.
I knew a tough season was ahead. I was confident or maybe even prideful about it. Thinking "I know Lord. Yeah, yeah, we've been here before. It will be fine. Whatever it is I'll just pray and let You get us through it." Well that is not how it went at all. And it took me longer than it should have to recognize my pride. I'm really having to use discipline and self control to keep my eyes and heart focused on the Lord. This was a tough season. Much more difficult than I anticipated. Of course as it was approaching I just figured we'd been through tough seasons before, it won't be so bad. I know it's coming so I'm mentally prepared. But I found myself crying at some point every day for a week straight.
This season hasn’t ended, and I’m learning through this another level of needing Jesus. He is for sure stretching my faith and how glorious is that!? Because I am weak and He is strong. So although I know He is in control, and I know with Him I will prosper, I am still human with human emotions, desires, and needs. But every time I started to feel overwhelmed if I just stopped, breathed, prayed and honestly gave it to Him, it would get easier. So why is it so hard to think to do that in the moment? I've decided this must be one small reason why I'm in this season; to learn that discipline. He's conditioning me and growing my wisdom. And in that I find peace and comfort. Hallelujah!
“My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials,
knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience.
But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing” (James 1:2-4)